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Bug Zapper Questions
Got Bug Zapper Questions - We Have Answers!
Yes, we really sell the worlds largest and most effective hand held electric bug zapper. It looks like a tennis racket and decimates insects on contact.
- Is it possible that by possessing The SUPER LARGE BUG ZAPPER RACKET™, I might inadvertently cause the bugs in and around my home to become more aggressive, sort of like an insect defense mechanism kicking in once they realize that I have equipped myself with state of the art weaponry?
Absolutely not. Actually, statistics have shown that the complete opposite is true. Once the word hits the street that you are strapped with The SUPER LARGE BUG ZAPPER RACKET™, no insect will dare cross your path. The overall bug population around your dwelling will likely dramatically decrease once word is out that you are packing heat – and in the insect kingdom, word travels fast!
When you have an insect cornered, right before you move in for the kill - give that speech from Pulp Fiction.
- Is Buying a bug zapper considered patriotic?
You better believe it. Last we checked the declaration of independence granted all Americans certain inalienable rights, and among them, the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Now...If you cannot even walk out into your own backyard without getting your face swarmed – are your rights not indeed being violated? The majority of legal experts say yes, and it is a generally accepted principal that most insects show absolutely no respect for federal law. In fact, there is only one tried and tested way to get respect from a bug - you have to TAKE IT!
- We are really close to buying a bug zapper from you, and we feel like that all it would take for us to commit to a bug zapper purchase at this exact moment in time would be a perfectly timed viewing of an incredibly disgusting insect video - you know, something truly appalling, the type of insect video that has no real bearing on our actual lives, but that would strike irrational fear into our hearts anyway, and push us over the edge to an impulsive bug zapper purchase? Do you have anything on this website that would fit the bill?
Botfly videos - nuff' said!
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